As a student of Jewish history, with over fifty years of study under my belt, I am continually amazed when I learn of Jewish historical figure who has managed to escape my net of knowledge.

Recently while watching a documentary on  Netflix,  a Jewish Australian WWI general caught my attention.

I had never heard of him,.

So I decided to make him the subject of today’s quiz

Here is the quiz’s one and only rule:

I shall give you 10 hints or clues about our historical Jewish personage.

If you determine his name before the clues run out, you are awarded  the honorary title of  “Scholar of Jewish Military History.”

If you fail, better luck on our next quiz.

I must give thanks and gratitude to Wikipedia for their assistance in providing me the information (from which I have taken, very liberally) to write this blog.

1. He was a Australian military commander in the First World War.
2. He is considered one of the best allied generals of the First World War.
3. He is considered the most famous commander in Australian history.
4. He was born of Jewish parents in Posen province, Kingdom of Prussia.
5. His appointment as commander of the 4th Infantry Brigade was met with protest in part due to his religion.
6. By the end of the war, he had acquired an outstanding reputation for intellect, personal magnetism, management and ingenuity.
7. Field Marshal Bernard Montgomery wrote, “I would name him the best general on the Western Front in Europe.”
8. In 1927, he became president of the newly founded Zionist Federation of Australia and New Zealand.
9. His funeral, a Jewish service, was attended by approximately 300,000 mourners, which was the largest funeral crowd in Australia at that time.
10. He has a village named after him in Israel.

Sorry, no more clues.

So if you haven’t figured out who this Jewish military hero is, here is the answer:

Sir John Monash.

Thanks for taking my Jewish history quiz.

To learn a whole lot more about General John Monash Google and/or Wikipedia him.

It’s an amazing story.

I studied the titillating Israeli headline, “Protestor Bares Breasts on Top of Giant Menorah.”

I was fascinated.

OMG—not in the Holy Land—not on a symbol of the nation.

What an act of defiance!

What demon possessed this young woman?

Quelle horror!

But before watching the video on YouTube, I closed my innocent eyes and pondered,

“Is it a sin for a married man to see the tits of a young Israeli woman as she sits on top of a menorah?”

As I have always said,”Where is a rabbi when you need one.”

“What effect will these bare-breasted images have on me when I light the candles on Hanukkah?

Thankfully, the media had covered these two offending objects from the public’s view.

My road to heaven rescued by some do-gooder with a Magic Marker.

Carefully, I listened to the commentator discuss the protestor’s behavior and I wondered:

Was she orthodox?

Was she a Sabra?

What will her mother and father think of their daughter’s proclivities?

What year had she made aliyah?

Had she already given birth to a child?

Had she served in the IDF?

Was she an American disguised as an Israeli?

How well-endowed was this mystery woman?

The video, nor the commentary, helped me resolve these issues but I doubted she was frum.

I thanked G-d that she didn’t go “Full Monty.”

I realized the possible effects of  such a shanda would have had on the body politic.

Would this act of frontal nudity have caused the government to dissolve?

Would there be a need for new elections?

I’d wait for the cabinet to meet to discuss the repercussions.

How would this act of belligerence effect Israeli-Arab relations?

I wondered.

But new thoughts crept into my brain, “Would the menorah have to be washed, scrubbed and re-blessed by a rabbi for it to be koshered?

Would this reblessing be captured on YouTube?”

As I scanned other YouTube videos, I asked, “Who would have thought that the mammary glands of a young female would cause such a stir in such an ancient land?

And I realized, that only G-d knows the answers to such mysteries.”

Canadian-born Jewish American actor, Seth Rogen announces on some podcast, “I was fed a ‘huge’ amount of lies about Israel.

I read on with great interest, thinking,  “How many lies equal a ‘huge’ amount?”

Seth gives one example.

Now, I think this schmendrick is doing his piss-off Jews schtick.

Seth says, “When I was younger, I wasn’t told that Palestinians lived on the land that became the Jewish state.”

Does schmecklepunim think we are frigging idiots.

He throws crap in the direction of the wind hoping it ends up in our mouths..

“Well, when I was younger, I wasn’t told that some Canadian-born Jewish American actors/comedians/writers/directors were idiots.

But intuitively I kinda knew it.

I did sense that they talked a lot of crap, made up a bunch of funny jokes, smoked a lot of dope—okay a ‘huge’ amount of weed and expected other people to eat their crap without critically thinking of the words that flowed like sewage out of their mouths.

Jokes are always funnier if you don’t think.

But have I now lost a ‘huge’ amount of respect in the Canadian educational system for having failed to teach Seth the history of the Middle East.

For failing to teach him how to use Google or Wikipedia or go to a library.

For failing to teach him how to think on his own.

For failing to teach him to understand that words have consequences.

For failing to teach him that not all people are idiots.

No, I have not.

Why because I know this mamsur is  a huge BSer.

Seth makes crap up.

I can hear him saying, “I was fed a lot of lies about Canada. When I was younger, I wasn’t told that the Indians lived on the land that became Canada.”

Seth lives for applause, laughs and attention.

Seth knows if you want applause and attention make some crap up.

But please G-d, I don’t want hear a mea culpa from this piece of dreck.

“I’m sorry, I was stoned when I said that stupidity on that podcast.”

Lowering his voice, “I really didn’t mean it.”

“I know my fans aren’t idiots, especially not my Jewish fans.

I missed a lot of days at Hebrew school, so maybe they did teach the history of the Israel and its war for independence.

I know I gotta go to Israel if I ever want to make another film in Hollywood.

So I am going to Israel to pray at that ‘wall’ where Jews stick pieces of paper into.”

Sorry Seth, you have managed to built a wall around my wallet and your movies.

And for a ‘huge’ number of reasons and for a ‘huge’ number of years, I will never spend a cent to see any of your films.