My Achy Breaky Arm

I laid in bed tossing and turning.

“Why, you may ask.

Why weren’t you able to fall asleep?”

Well, my upper left arm ached, throbbed and was warm to the touch.

Yup, you guessed it.

I got my booster shot.

“Didn’t the pharmacist give you a heads up?”

Yup, she warned me, “Your booster might cause a reaction. Take two Tylenol before you go to bed.”

Yup, I listened and took two Tylenol before hitting the sack.

Yup, you’re right, “It takes time for those pills to kick in.”

So sleep escaped me and pain ruled the night.

So I had time to reflect on something.

My aching arm yelled, “Think about Covid!”

Who can argue with an aching left arm?”

Not me.

Do you recall, in the early Covid days, when some jerks said, “The coronavirus is was going to disappear in a week.”

Well, you and I knew better, so I went on an expedition to find the most highly protective masks in the world.

You guessed it—N-95s.

You remember, what a pain in the ass it was to find quality masks.

Well, I was late to the hunt and paying the price.

I remembered my frustration when I asked the cashiers in numerous drugstores, “Miss, got any N-95 masks left?”

“Sorry sir, we’re all sold out.”

But I was on a mission.

A mission to obtain masks for my whole family.

A life-saving mission to protect my family.

As I got in my car I said, “Think outside of the box. Who else needs N-95 masks?

You guessed it.

My next stop, Home Depot, where a helpful clerk pointed to the paint aisle and said, “Go to the paint brush section, you might find some over there.”

My eyes lit up like a sinner who has found the Lord.

I found a full box.

G-d is good.

I know you can’t believe my luck.

A whole box!

I was as ecstatic as a fly in a Waffle House.

I grabbed the N-95s—not considering its cost—and headed to check-out.

I held on to them so tightly, fearing a crazed mob of mask vandals would try to rip them out of my hands.

Where did I go next?

You guessed it.

Fed Ex, where I divvied up the masks and sent them to the kids.

I relished the role of family protector.

And now the Tylenol kicked in.

My throbs and aches subsided.

My warm arm cooled.

My dreams vanquished the pain and solitude ruled the night.

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