As a highly religious fellow, I asked myself, “If I were Donald Trump and an assassin’s bullet nearly ended my life, what message would I take out of that experience?”

Well, here’s my version of the thoughts that ran through Donald’s brain in that millisecond when he heard the shots, felt the warm blood running down his neck, and headed for the ground.

Lord, since that bullet nearly clipped off my ear I’ll take it that your message to me is to start listening and obeying to your commandments. You’ve warned me that I better change, or you won’t be so forgiving next time.

Well Lord, here’s my list of everything I’m gonna do to correct the error of my ways.

1. I promise to stop sinning to regain your favor;
2. I’ll stop being a narcissist;
3. I’ll start finding compassion in my heart for other people’s problems;
4. I’ll stop hanging out with racists and handing them my megaphone;
5. I’ll no longer walk in the darkness and pray to the Devil;
6. I’ll stop lying;
7. I’ll stop stealing money from charities;
8. I’ll start reading the Good Book;
9. I’ll stop calling our brave soldiers “Suckers and Losers;”
10. I’ll stop trying to steal elections;
11. I’ll no longer make a habit of practicing the Seven Deadly Sins;
12. I’ll stop selling our secrets to the enemy;
13. I’ll stop being an insurrectionist;
14. I’ll start paying my fair share of taxes;
15. I’ll never separate babies from their mothers again;
16. I’ll never take a woman’s right to choose away from them again;
17. I’ll stop making fun of the disabled;
18. I’ll stop selling sneakers and Trump Bibles;
19. I’ll stop nominating unethical and heartless judges to the Supreme Court;
20. I’ll stop disgracing the office of the presidency;
21. I’ll tell my followers to start traveling down the straight and narrow road of redemption;
22. I’ll withdraw from the race for president and the Republican party;
23. I stop paying for sex with whores and porn stars;
24. I’ll stop molesting and raping women;
25. I’ll remain faithful to my wife;
26. I’ll burn my signed copy of Mein Kampf;
27. I’ll learn to love people who are not just white straight men;
28. I promise to support gun control;
29. I’ll stop being a traitor;
30. I won’t hangout with pedophiles;
31. I will tear up my contract with Beelzebub, the one where I gave him my soul for fame, money and power;
32. I won’t try to become America’s first dictator;
33. I learn the meaning of the following words: Empathy, honesty and faith;
34. . I’ll try to be a nice person and not kill democracy in America.

As Trump was thrown into the back of his black limo and he realized he was safe, he looked through the sunroof at the blue sky and white clouds and whispered:

“Lord, you realize I was joking. I was kidding around. I’ll never do any of that crap on that list.”

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Thumbs up.—Gary

Hey Mort! Genius! Thumbs up!!

Thumbs up.—Donna

Thumbs up.—Howard

Thumbs up.—Sandy

Thumbs up.—Paul

Thumbs up.—Laurie

Thumbs up.—Sue

Thumbs up.—Sharon

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Thumbs up.—Gary

Thumbs up.—Sandy

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Thumbs up.—Lori

Ha.———-Jason

Thumbs up.—Lorraine

Thumbs up.—Ray

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Thumbs up.—Donna

Was this posted to TOI? Nisan

Good one.—Barbara

Thumbs up.—Bobby

Thumbs up.—Ruth

Thumbs up.—Neil

Thumbs up.—Donna

Thumbs up.—Sandra

Thumbs up.—Perry

Thumbs up.—Kathleen

Thumbs up.—Lorraine

Perry, Thanks for sharing.—Mort

I sat in my office reading an article in the Writer’s Digest entitled, “Writing Big Feelings (Minus the Maudlin)” by Peter Mountford. Peter discusses how authors should handle 10 basic human emotions—anger, happiness, sadness, fear, surprise, disgust, pride, shame, embarrassment, and excitement—when writing stories.

I pondered why “love” was not listed. Who knows? But it’s my favorite human emotion.

Then I asked myself, “How many of my stories contain those basic emotions?” And as I thought, I saw a white bolt of lightening strike my banana tree. In five seconds, thunder boomed, crashed and rumbled the foundation of my home. And yes, my house creaked. And as I listened to the downpour, I imagined hundreds of white winged angels collecting shissels (tubs) of rain and dumping them from the clouds. Yes, we writers are blessed with vivid imaginations.

Now for a second day those angels worked nonstop flooding South Florida homes, filling swimming pools to the brim, and inundating the tarmacs at Fort Lauderdale International Airport.

Acidic fear started to burn a small hole in the pit of my stomach.

You may ask ,”Why?”

Well, because tomorrow morning I had scheduled a flight to Alaska, where I and my family were set to go on a cruise. A reunion and a vacation three years in the planning. What do they say about plans going awry. Yes, G-d does act in mysterious ways. But why does it seem that his angels always seem to rain on my parade.

Then I heard my iPhone ping. I jumped to get my phone. The text message from Air Alaska read:

We’re sorry to inform you that due to severe weather conditions, your flight has been cancelled. See your email for more info.

WTF was I going to do!

I called my eldest son, Jason, and for the next two hours we worked on alternative plans. We managed to get flights out of Orlando and make it to the cruise on time.

G-d is good.

I went back to reading Mountford’s article and I realized that in a matter of two hours and three minutes, I had experienced: anger, happiness, sadness, fear, excitement and love.

And I was able to turn my experience into this month’s President’s message.

So SFWA members keep writing about your basic emotions. They are what make life and writing so interesting.

Your president, Mort

The second Blake walked into the Green Room, a cloud of smoke enveloped him. The smoke caused tears, pierced his nostrils, and settled deep in his lungs. He coughed and thought, “What a venue! My movie is playing Hollywood. My dream has come true. Am I tasting tears of joy? Am I cherishing the sweet smell of grass blended with the sweet taste of success? And in his head, he responded with a resounding, “Yes, I am.”

Blake recalled a quote he had read years ago, “Success is all about persistence and doing the right thing for the long term.” That sentence summed up Blake’s movie-making mantra. For he understood the meaning of persistence. He worked his ass off to produce, direct, and act in his feature film. And now he was working his butt off to get his We Need Rent Money 420 Tour off the ground.

As the room pulsated to the beat of L.A. Woman, Blake joined Morrison and The Doors in belting out the words:

L.A. Woman, L.A. Woman

L.A. Woman, you’re my woman…

And as Blake sang, he heard cheers, felt hugs, and pats on his back.

He couldn’t believe it. Three of the WNRM actors—who had moved to LA in search of fame, fortune, and females—had come to congratulate him.

“WOW! What a f—king surprise! I didn’t know you guys were going to show up. Thanks for coming.”

Cameron Lee Price replied, “Congrats Mr. Director, you and our feature-length film made it to L.A. Now, you’re almost famous. It’s time to celebrate.”

“Cameron, thanks for being here. You guys showing up means the world to me,” Blake said.

Then Julian Steinberg piped in, “Blakester, welcome to La La Land, the movie capital of the world. I hope for your sake, Spielberg in the audience.”

Blake laughed and replied, “Me too. Julian, I’ll keep an eye out for him.”

Then Nathan Shapiro, holding up his car keys proclaimed, “Blake Laitner, on behalf of Los Angeles County, I award you the keys to the City of Angels. And with the power vested in me, I proclaim today ‘Blake Laitner Day.’ And tomorrow we’re going to Grauman’s Chinese Theater and adding your handprints and signature to the Walk of Fame. “

Blake raised his hands, stretched his fingers, and bellowed, “Hooray for Hollywood! My hands love being dipped in concrete.”

As Blake and his friends took their seats, he craned his neck to measure the size of the audience. Smiling he thought, “When it comes to movie theater crowds, size really does matter.”

As the We Need Rent Money title appeared on the Green Room‘s large silver screen, Blake whispered, “Guys, persistence pays off. I made this happen.”

Then the credits rolled and a silence filled the theater. Within minutes the venue was filled with uproarious laughter. A sound that made Blake’s ears kvell.

As he watched the movie, Blake’s thoughts turned to the film’s second stop on its 420 Tour. He remembered how hard he tried to get his movie into an L.A. film festival. But he failed. And now years later, he had succeeded. His persistence paid off. He was like a pit bull, sinking his teeth deep into this project and not letting go until completion.

Yes, the second stop on the 420 Tour was an awesome success. The audience loved it when three of the movie’s stars talked about the film’s production. And a week later the icing appeared on the cake in the form of an email from Megan Blevins, the Social Media-Marketing Manager/Event Coordinator at The Higher Path LA & The Green Room on Ventura.

“The Higher Path was proud to sponsor the 2nd stop on the We Need Rent Money 4/20 Tour! The Green Room was the perfect venue to host this special event, and we loved seeing the crowd that turned out for the movie, including a few of its actors!

Thank you Blake for bringing your film to Los Angeles, and we look forward to seeing you continue to grow your career in the film industry.” 

These words of praise reminded Blake about what Bret Born, the owner of Ascend Recreational Cannabis Dispensary in Portland said about the 420 tour:

“Not only do I believe in your movie, I believe in this tour, and I want to be its first venue.” 

On Monday, Blake’s nose returned to the grindstone. He sent emails, did research, and called dispensaries across the nation, looking for the third stop on the 420 Tour. And while he grinded away, he repeated his mantra: Persistence pays off, Persistence pays off, Persistence pays off.

————————————————————————————————————–

Thumbs up.—Howard

Great!!!—Barbara

That is exhilarating!! I hope Blake’s success continues, and the cement comes off of his hands (ha ha!) His talents are blossoming—Lois

Very nice.—Jason

Engaging and informative! I resonate with your perspective. Thank you for sharing actionable advice. Looking forward to implementing these strategies. Keep it up!—MoviesBox

This post is a gem! Your passion for the topic is evident. Thank you for the valuable insights. Can’t wait to read more from your blog. Keep up the excellent work!—MoviesBox

Thumbs up.—MovieBox

Thumbs up.—Laurie

That it does. I love your (as I call it) “Let’s take a walk, I wanna tell you a story” style. It’s just great. Much success to Blake.—Howard

Thumbs up.—Perry

Thumbs up.—Max

Thumbs up.—Janee

Thumbs up.—Joanne

Thumbs up.—Cary

Thumbs up.—Steve

Thumbs up.—Gary

Thumbs up.—Alan

Thumbs up.—Linda

Perry, Thanks for sharing.—Mort

Thumbs up.—Neil

Thumbs up.—Doris

Thumbs up.—Val

Thumbs up.—Rita

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Thumbs up.—Don

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Thumbs up.— Fabiyas

Thumbs up.—Bella

Thumbs up.—Louis

Thumbs up.—Joseph

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Thumbs up.—Joe

Thumbs up.—South Florida Writers Connection