Narrator: When we last left our nefarious duo, Boris cried in his pillow while Natasha took care of the president’s needs. The next morning, at the request of the president, we see our spies leaving the White House and walking toward the Russian Embassy.
As they approached Wisconsin Avenue, the pair sit on a bench under a blossoming cherry tree.
Natasha places a Virginia Slim into her long, black, Bakelite cigarette holder and lights it. As she exhales a cloud of white smoke, her face glows from memories of her session with the Prez.
Boris: Vell my cute commie comrade, tell me about your escapades with the president last night?
Natasha: Vell my handsome evil genius, be patient. I think you vill enjoy reading about all my exploits in my report to the Fearless Leader. But let me tell you his hands are not small and his Twitter account is huge. He grabs like a drunken Soviet soldier. The man needs lots of attention. He made me repeat over and over again, “Donald, you are the greatest!” while wearing that silly baseball cap. When I said, Mr. President you are the best I ever had. He smirked that dumb look—like he has heard that line a thousand times before. You vill never guess what he yelled at his ultimate moment of joy.
Boris: I give up. Vhat did he yell?
Natasha: Hillary! I laughed so hard I almost peed. He doesn’t seem to be able to get over that last election.
Boris: My Russian nesting baby doll, did you secure any video on the iPhone? Remember how I taught you how to place it on the night stand.
Natasha: Boris you No-Goodnik, of course I took pictures, not as arousing as the Moscow tapes but still quite stimulating. He even told me to Instagram him some of the more titillating shots.
Suddenly gliding out of the sky, a flying squirrel lands on the park bench and a large moose appears from behind the cherry tree. The moose holds papers.
Rocky: Boris Badenov on behalf of the United States government, I serve you with this subpoena ad testificandum to appear before Russian election tampering grand jury.
Bullwinkle: Natasha Fatale on behalf of Robert Mueller, Special Prosecutor, I serve you with this grand jury subpoena.
Boris: Gentlemen, I am sorry to inform you, that we are not the people you just named. My name is Emile Zola and this is my lovely wife Marie.
Bullwinkle: Sorry to have bothered you. We must have made a mistake.
Rocky: Hokey smoke! Bullwinkle you dimwitted clod. These are the same two spies that tried to kill us in Frostbite Falls in the Sixties.
Rocky: Boris and Natasha you have been served and you better bring all the videos, stills and reports you have sent to the Fearless Leader to the deposition. Dasvidanya.
Narrator: Stay tuned next time for our next episode, Making a Run for the Border or Asking for a Presidential Pardon.
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