Kanye Shut Yo Mouth Rap

PublishedOctober 11, 2022 Post authormortlaitner@bellsouth.net

FILE – Kanye West arrives at the Vanity Fair Oscar Party on Feb. 9, 2020, in Beverly Hills, Calif. West, who goes by Ye, is ending the contract between his company Yeezy and the struggling clothing retailer, confirmed his lawyer in an emailed statement to The Associated Press Thursday, Sept. 15, 2022. (Photo by Evan Agostini/Invision/AP, File)

Kanye, I’m bit sleepy tonite

but when I wake up, yo and I gonna fight

Yo be Death Con 3 threatening the JEWISH PEOPLE

Now we gonna hang yo privates to the highest steeple

We be puttin’ yo in a tizzle

makin’ yo world kinda fizzle

Kanye, yo ain’t no gangsta from the hood

Picking on the Israelites ain’t doing ya no good

Remember you ain’t no longer the bomb

Cauz we Hebz ain’t gonna stay calm

On my tribe yo be pickin’

Now yo be aksin’ for a lickin’

We be bustin’ our moves on you

Soon you be learnin’ not to mess with a Jew

Kanye West, stop toying with us

or webe puttin’ yo ass on a bus

You ain’t no longer a Big Willy

We gonna make you look kinda silly

On Instagram, yo be mouthin’ against my peeps

Now they be beggin’ to make you weeps

You betta watch yo mouth

Or we be callin’ you a big fat louz

Showin’ no respect for our 13 tribes

Rabbiz be cursing yo good vibes

The ‘Brews be tellin’ me, “Mort, take away the bro’s Bentley and his Patek too

And while you’re at it, put his big fat ass in the middle of zoo

Kanye, “You ain’t showin’ us Hebes no respect

And we be tired of sayin’ “What the hecht”

Kim be sayin’, “Be kind to the brother, he be crazy

But I be knowin’ you rich and yo ain’t lazy

Kim be talkin’ to the Fedz

Asking them to take away yo medz

Kim be tellin’ us you be wacked

We be going to make sure you get sacked

Kanye, Jared told me you got rants in yo pants

Betta show our brother some love, cauz he own yo underpantz

Yosemites wantz me to take the bling off yo neck

And flatten yo big fat ass onto the deck

Kanye, go talk to yo Mama

ask her what to say

Or we circumcized peeps gonna make you pay

The “Exceptional Achievement Rap” by Sampson Ray Simon

PublishedOctober 9, 2022 Post authormortlaitner@bellsouth.net

The “We Need Rent Money” (WNRM) team believes in going the extra mile.

So when the Multi Dimension Independent Film Festival (MDIFF) called our movie an “Exceptional Achievement” we found it hard to believe.

And when MDIFF said, “We love your project” we kvelled and asked ourselves, “How do we match this much love?”

Well, one of the lead actors in WNRM, Sampson Ray Simon came up with the solution.

Let’s write, sing and send them a rap song.

Blake Laitner said, “Brilliant!

I bet MDIFF never had a rap song written about them.”

Well, here it is:

“The Exceptional Achievement Rap” lyrics by Sampson Ray Simon

Try to rap along with us.

We Need Rent Money, fillin’ the seats wit’
New awards, Exceptional Achievement!
Two trailers out, these are elite clips,
The comedy slapz, you wouldn’t believe it!
We Need Rent Money in ya film festivals,
Smoke all ya’ weed, eat all ya’ edibles!
Laitner Productions with a new invention,
and Exceptional Achievement from Multi-Dimension!

Well done, Sampson!

We knew you were a rapper’s delight.

And Multi Dimension you are the best.

And who would have guessed, that I too, could lay down some rap.

Here’s my song on how it feels to be rejected by a film festival.

“The Film Festival Rejection Rap”

Rejectors you know nothing about going that extra mile

So you don’t even deserve to get our 420 smile

Now you be wishin’ we wrote a rap about your fest

Ain’t gonna happen becauz you ain’t the best

Now for those festivals sendin’ us a reject letter,

Telling us other films are so much better

Now you be wishin’ you had given us a prize

Instead of makin’ up all those fancy lies

Now you’d take a cap in the knee

Rather than tellin’ our film to go take a pee

Well suckas it ain’t going hap

You ain’t neva goin’ to get your own rap.

Now you wanna be clapin’

But you ain’t getting no free rappin‘

You made us “reel” sad

Now we be making you “reel” mad

Now that you be leavin‘

Let’s call the whole thing even

Wow! That felt real good.

Now, I wish I did a rap about all those colleges that rejected me.

A Prayer for Republicans Before the Midterms

PublishedOctober 6, 2022 Post authormortlaitner@bellsouth.net

O Lord, let them remember the taste of liberty won by their relatives on bloody fields of Gettysburg

O Lord, let them recall when they stood up against racial hatred on the buses headed to Mississippi

O Lord, let them remember when they fought for Women’s Rights

O Lord, remove this metastatic cancer of hate that flows deep in their veins

O Heavenly Father, give that much needed transfusion of love

O Heavenly Father, grant them the courage to remove their binders, to free their peripheral vision and see your truth

O Heavenly Father, heal their souls with your old time religion and teach them the meaning of salvation

O Heavenly Father, teach them all of the freedoms found in our Constitution, not just our right to bear arms

O G-d, teach them that liars and sinners and conmen have no right to hold, nor touch, nor preach from your holy book

O G-d, teach them that our founding fathers signed the Declaration of Independence to rid this nation of tyrants

O G-d, let them understand the meaning of “Justice is blind”

O G-d, make them walk in the shoes of the immigrant for at least one short hour

O Supreme Being, inflame their hearts with compassion for the less fortunate

O Supreme Being, enlighten their minds on the difference between insurrection and resurrection

O Supreme Being, when they stand before a voting machine in these midterm elections, let them meditate on repairing the world and not destroying it

O Supreme Being, rescue them from the evil one and his morally bankrupt sycophants

And in your name, I thank you and say, “Hallelujah”

Amen